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Do you know the feeling one gets... -- poetry by Ophelia Flowers

Do you know the feeling one gets when they look at a picture of a baby and they don’t remember that time for themselves, but they know they were happy then and they aren’t anymore?


I’ve been wandering around in stores

And looking at the pictures on the shelves and on the walls

And I see all these smiling faces

Smiling like I did at some point, I’m sure

But I don’t smile like that anymore

I don’t hardly smile at all, at anything, anymore.


I stare at the floor most of the time

But I’ve been trying to fix my posture

Cause it makes me unapproachable

“Stand up and be somebody!”

That’s what my family all say

But I don’t know how to tell them

I’m not somebody at all

Certainly not the person they remember

Smiling like the pictures on the wall.


Today I saw a picture of a baby

And I almost started crying

Cause I can’t remember being happy like that

And I don’t think I ever will

And I’ll never get that back

Despite the fact I wish I could

But there’s not really a point

In wishing impossible wishes like that anymore.


 

Ophelia Flowers (She/They) is a young, queer poet; from a small town near Raleigh, North Carolina. She is currently a junior in high school and enjoys music, poetry, and film. Outside of writing, she also plays bass guitar in a band called "I Hate Sports" and wastes away in bed while listening to bands like The Mountain Goats, Sadness, and Deftones. Her future aspirations are to one day be able to work as a writer and finally get out of small-town suburban hell.

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