how strange — Mars Lily

there's blood underneath my fingernails.
i don't remember why.
it doesn't matter, not anymore.
(has it always been there?)
i was always good at hiding when i was young.
no one noticed for hours, sometimes.
it's easy to misplace a child, i suppose.
(the water does nothing to wash it away.)
i liked dark, cramped places the most.
no one could hurt me there;
no one would even think to look.
(i've scrubbed for hours—it's still not clean.)
it gave me comfort, i think,
to be where no reasonable person would ever be.
god made me especially to curl up in rejected spaces
and make a home out of discarded things.
(what have i done?)
i don't think i was built wrong.
but, i've always been somewhere short of normal.
(am i impure?)
there's something about connecting with the unloved.
something about the longing to have that for myself.
do they see me now?
(i crawled out of the dark.)
there's blood underneath my fingernails.

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Mars Lilly is an aspiring educator who enjoys reading, writing, and drawing in their free time. They have big dreams to become a renowned author and artist someday, and to see the world outside the state of Minnesota where they reside.